Hoping against hope!!

When hope is hungry, everything feeds it. ~Mignon McLaughlin



As we continued to speak with Dr. Coulter, he suggested that we also do MR Spectroscopy just to rule out any other cause for his disability. The Magnetic Resonance spectroscopy is done to study the metabolic information about brain tissue. It meant that if there was problem at the biochemical level, it could be treated with drugs. This new development sent waves of excitement. We are all hoping that, MRS would be the indemnity we were seeking. It would mean all the efforts we put in coming to the US and not to mention the huge financial splurge would be justified.


http://spinwarp.ucsd.edu/NeuroWeb/Text/mrs-TXT.htm


All these tests are quite cruel to young children. If the test is the next morning, you cannot feed the baby after midnight, till the tests are complete as they will be administered anaesthesia and if the tummies are full they will throw up. But then you put up with all this thinking that the results would be worth the trouble.

I still clearly remember that day, we were up early in the morning, it had been snowing all night and we rushed to the hospital as we had an early appointment. I was so full of nerves and the MRS room was on the 36th floor. Yatish was sitting snugly in his pram, oblivious to what was happening, except maybe wondering why his mom was not force feeding him and must have been secretly happy about it. As we were going up the lift, somewhere on the 32nd floor an older looking lady got into the lift and the moment she laid her eyes on Yatish, she squealed “Oh my God, Oh my God”. I was taken aback by this sudden outburst and I looked at her, half nervous, half scared not knowing what had happened. Then she said “I have never seen such exquisite eyelashes like your son’s” and then she got out, wishing me all the best.

These are moments in life when it sets you thinking, we are so consumed with the thought of what we don’t have that we forget to appreciate these little things which we have. This is the beauty of creation. Here I have a son who cannot do anything by himself but has been endowed with so many beautiful qualities, what he does not have clearly pales in front of what he has.

The scan itself took about 3 hours and it seemed the longest 3 hours of my life. Now we had to wait for the results. That would take about two days.

When the results came, we were shattered. I am not quite sure whether it was the right thing to feel, but I was thinking since all the biochemical levels were well within acceptable limits, it meant, that the cause of his disability was nothing to do with the metabolism of brain tissue and hence no opportunity to treat and correct it.

Again we hit a dead end but then a new development happened and we were told to take one more MRI scan.......